Ketchup is really tasty on French fries - Right?
Well - I dare you to try and put any on my fries - you'll end up with my fork stuck in your hand faster than you can say: "But I was only trying to help!"

When I was a kid, I wanted to have an earring, like a pirate, but those days are gone - not interested!
But, look around: can't say that the fashion didn't catch on - good for them! - Not for me!

Or, a tattoo - same thing applies.

I know a few people who love to tie other people up and do strange things to their genitals.
I also know a few people who like that done to them. It's fine by me - I have to admit that it was fascinating to watch (some of them like that) - But, not for me! I seem to be able to achieve the same results without making such a big production out of it. I also prefer privacy.

I even know people that get a sexual kick out of laying their cigarette in an ashtray in such a way that it touches the tip of a stranger's cigarette laying in the same ashtray (arrrrrrrrrrrgh.) That's O.K.

I like a little blow job now and then - do unto others? - it'll probably take some major torture to get me to do it - maybe not even then.

You're probably thinking: What a nut!

Well maybe - but, I'm fine with it - I'm not hurting anyone - I do not need to convert anyone - I do not think my way is the best - I do not think my way is the only way - I was not put on this Earth to make anyone think like me, talk like me or joke like me - I do not think you will go to Hell if you do not listen to me - I do not think there is a Hell - if there is a Hell and you would like to go there, be my guest. I think I made this point.

So I do NOT need someone to shave me! If I need shaving - I will shave myself! It's the same with saving